10 Simple Ways To Maintain Connections

We’re all so crazy busy these days! There never seems to be enough time to tick off all your essential tasks like work, study, gym, and chores, let alone achieve any of those “nice-to-do” extras. Unfortunately, in a frenetic lifestyle, our connections to others often get neglected!

In his book Lost Connections, Johann Hari identifies connection to others as one of the major determining factors in the onset and progression of depression. Lack of connection isn’t limited to isolated people. Johann points out how easy it is to be surrounded by people and experience multiple interactions every day and still not feel any real connection.

That’s why we’ve compiled this list of quick and simple things you can do to show the love and maintain your most important connections for your sake and theirs!

Make plans for a catch-up

In an ideal world, a catch-up over coffee or dinner is a great way to reconnect with loved ones, but it is not always practical or affordable. Get creative, take a walk, a swim, or shoot some hoops together. You will both benefit from a double hit of endorphins, one from exercising and one from feeling connected.

Plan a holiday or experience

Planning an event creates great opportunities for incidental moments of connection. The day you call to check accommodation details for your upcoming trip to FitHer Expo might just happen to be the day your friend desperately needs to hear your voice.

Read a book together

This one may not be for everyone but if you both happen to be readers, you can read the same book at the same time, and check in regularly to share your thoughts. Check out our latest list of recommended reads here. [link to article] If you are not a reader, this works with movies and television shows too but we highly recommend trying a book because you both get the added benefits of decreasing stress, enhancing knowledge, and increasing focus and concentration.

Call a friend every day

Martin Heppell, presenter of The Resilience Project advocates calling a friend each day during your commute. Martin has compiled a special group of contacts in his phone and goes through it in order, calling one friend each day just to say “I love you”. If you are short on time just tell your friend, “Hey, I am short on time but I just wanted to check in and tell you I love you. Everything ok with you?” If you keep up with the practice, you will talk again soon and catch up on anything you may have missed in your shortened call.

Take the moment

You know that moment when you are about to do something, maybe an exciting new experience, or a run or walk, or perhaps something daunting, and you think, “Gee I wish X was here with me”. Take that moment. Send your friend a quick text, let them know that you miss them and you wish they were there. Sometimes just a heart emoji is enough.

Send a Card

We rarely get snail mail these days, even bills are generally electronic. Receiving a card in the mail is a little gift that brings so much joy. You can buy or make a card or postcard or recycle one you have at home. The fact that you have taken the time to create and post a personalised message will mean a lot.

Send a selfie

Seeing the faces of loved ones always brings joy. Even if it makes you miss that person it still fills your cup with a little bit more love. You don't need to post your selfie on all of your socials, just send it to someone special, a little moment in time just for the two of you.

Give them a shout-out on socials

If social media is your thing, give a friend a shout-out. Let everyone know how awesome your friend is and why you love them.

Set reminders on your calendar for special events

Knowing someone made space in their mind and their day to think about what is going on in yours is truly meaningful. It is impossible to remember every birthday, job interview, first day, or big test. Use the power of technology and set reminders for events big and small, call or text to let them know you have their back, you are happy for them, or you are simply thinking of them.

Say “I love you”

Author and founder of The Resilience Project, Hugh Van Cuylenberg talks openly about getting comfortable with saying “I love you”. He credits his co-presenter Martin Heppell for teaching him how to say “I love you” to mates in a meaningful way. Traditionally we have reserved the “L” word for those closest to us, intimate partners and family. But as we spread ourselves across the country and the globe our definitions of family are changing, if we are lucky, we build tribes of people who we truly love.

Saying “I love you” can feel weird and awkward the first time but soon becomes comfortable and empowering! Start with your family, if you are not already there, and gradually spread the love throughout your tribe until it becomes the norm. You will be surprised how quickly the movement takes hold.